It always starts the same way. A quiet question at the end of practice. A whispered comment between matches. “Are we behind?”
You hear it in a parent’s voice, see it in a player’s posture. That creeping fear that someone else is further along. That someone else’s kid is hitting bigger, winning more, already committed to a D1 school. The fear that you’re missing something. That you’ve missed everything.
But here’s the truth. Your child is not behind. They’re becoming themselves.
Tennis development is not a checklist. There’s no fixed age where forehands click or L1 titles magically happen. There’s only the player and the path they’re on. And the more we try to rush that path—by forcing outcomes, comparing progress, or micromanaging growth—the more we interrupt the very thing we’re trying to build: a player who owns their journey.
Some kids win early. Some need more time. Some look effortless in practice and freeze in matches. Others lose every drill but fight like warriors when it matters. Some find their rhythm at 10. Others? Not until 18. All of them are valid. All of them are becoming something real, if we let them.
The best players don’t grow in straight lines. They stumble, adjust, evolve. What they all have in common is this: someone believed in them long enough to stop measuring them against a timeline.
So here’s the challenge: next time you watch your child, resist the urge to compare. Instead, pay attention to what’s unfolding. Not what they’re not doing, but what they’re starting to do. That little shift in attitude. The smarter shot selection. The moment they reset after a double fault instead of spiraling. These are the things that matter. Not how fast they’re going, but how honestly they’re learning.
The race to “keep up” is an illusion. There is no finish line at age 12 or 14 or 17. There’s only one goal: to build a player who loves the game enough to stay with it long enough to grow.
So let’s replace panic with patience, and let’s start measuring development not by where they are compared to others, but by how far they’ve come from yesterday.
Because your child isn’t behind. They’re just not done becoming who they’re meant to be. And that is something worth waiting for.
